Everyone's a comedian...

So as mostly everyone knows by now I did my first stand-up show last week. And it went really well. But it has everyone I talk to trying out their jokes. A good number of you are really funny but there are some lame jokes coming my way.
After telling my aunt josie about the show she went the rest of the weekend trying to give me ideas about jokes. She said to me that I should "tell jokes about how I threw-up everytime I ate as a baby". I would make a joke about that but it is no laughing matter. Baby bulemia is a major problem in this country. Everyday thousands of babies throw up because they want to look good in their huggies.
And I have an aunt Barbara who is from brazil and is extremely wierd. She wouldn't leave me alone until I told her one of my jokes. But it is wierd telling jokes to family members because they really don't know how big of a creep I am in real life.
Danny B tells me a lot of jokes. I actually think he is very funny. Just wanted to add that.
I even had a friend last week who wanted me to read a screenplay that he and his roomates wrote. Because now that I had one 6 minute set on a monday night I am a big deal (sarcasm). But I'm sure it'll be quite entertaining because that is a friend who I do find to be very funny.

Comedy clubs are kinda bullshit. All the comedy clubs I talk to require me to bring at least 6 friends with me if I want to perform. But they want me to do that on like tuesday and wednesday night so its not easy. On a friday or saturday I don't think I would have trouble getting friends to go but during the week is hard. And they all have cover charges and 2 drink minimums. So they want me to bring in at least $150 to do 6 minutes of stand-up for free. I understand that running the club is a business but I feel like they really rip you off. So I apologize in advance for making you spend so much money to see so little of me. But the show must go on and I'm in the process of booking more shows.
The next show I have booked is january 5th at Comix. Gimme a shout if you can go. The club manager would like all reservations before christmas.
So to close out the blog ill leave you with a couple of jokes I have been working on. And feel free to leave comments of any topic you want to see me joke about.
-"My friend was seeing this girl for a while and she wouldn't have sex with him so I did him a favor by being a real creep to her so that he can protect her. But then I raped her. That's my rape joke." I didn't really do that.
-"So I just ran into a former drug dealer of mine. Looked like death. Business is bad. Thought he might stab me. Wet myself a little" that really did happen.
-I was at a bar and a drunk chick came up to me. And she asks what I do. When I tell her I'm a comedian she asks me to tell a joke. I tell her "you're pretty and I really like you"
-I love having a camera on my phone because girls never know that I'm filming. Ill be humping away and they'll look up at me and say "Whatre u doing with your phone. R u filming?" No I'm not filming. I'm texting. "O ok". I sleep with really stupid women.

Those are some jokes I am starting to work on. I love feedback because everyone is a comedian....Did u see what I did there? That was the title.