Marist is for lovers!!

This past weekend Me, Brian, and Emily traveled to Marist college to visit Kelly, see Gym Class Heroes, and just get loose!!! It was a weekend of a lot of beer and good times.
The weekend started friday night when we arrived into the ghetto that is Poughkeepsie. But Kelly's place is dope. Way nicer than my place. So that night we talked about just hanging out, drinking some beers, and watching some movies at Kelly's. That didn't happen. We ended up going to the bar where I danced like a fool to various songs which included "Bye!Bye!Bye!". Yes, I really did the dance from the video that looks like someone is waving bye. The bar we went to, Darby's, was awesome. It was especially awesome because it stays open later than any bars in Cortland. So we headed home at like 3 and got to bed around 4.
The next day, the most unhealthy day ever, I woke up at 9. I hopped into the shower, which had a shower head on either side of the shower. That was awesome. Then I started drinking when I got out. I was still drunk from the night before so I never sobered up enough to get a hangover. I kept my can tops from the weekend and I drank 33 beers. I probably lost a couple also, so I probably had about 35+. When everyone else woke up we watched "Shit Happens". It is a documentary by Every Time I Die. It is fucking hilarious. Makes you just want to get loose(You need to watch the movie to get the "loose" joke I am making). So the reason we went there was to watch Gym Class Heroes. They are awesome. They were playing with Sugar Cult. They aren't awesome. The show started at 2 and I was absolutly hammered. Right before the show I was inside and Travis, the lead singer, came up to me and threw me a high 5 and said "You are the man, Lunchbox!"(this didn't really happen but I will pretend it did, but he really did walk past us). So the show was awesome. Especially because the hype man reminded me of Raudi Hernandez. If you don't remember him from high school you missed out. During the show, I looked up at the dorm building behind me and I see a window where people are putting up a sign for Sugar Cult. I look up 5 minutes later and it say "Sugar Cult U Suck". It was awesome.
After the show we went back to Kelly's and I needed a nap. So I went into her room to sleep on the floor but couldn't because Brian was in there and we were joking around to much. So I left the room with Brian in it and closed the door behind me. I slept on the floor between the bathroom and the kitchen. When I woke up I started drinking again, and Kelly's friend started rolling joints left and right. I think she wrapped one up in plastic. We ran out of beer so me and Brian went to go get more. We drove around Pough-town for what seemed like 4 days to me before we found a place with an ATM and beer. I also bought some really stale Cheetos there. They are probably older than me. So we smoked and drank until about 10 and then we went to the bar. Don't remember too much from there. All I really remember is playing one of the bar video game things on somebody else's tab. I just kept playing. I thought it was free. We left the bar and the cab driver was an ass. He totally passed the street we wanted. What good is a cab driver with no sense of direction? I should write his company a letter. So we got back and pretty much passed out. And I woke up in the morning and we left. That was my unhealthy weekend at Marist.


As a little side note- I am watching "Supersize Me" as I am writing this. If you haven't seen it, you should watch it. I really do not think I will eat fast food again. I probably will, but right now it seems like a really bad idea. I really feel like a piece of crap because I pretty much only ate fast food this weekend, and I drank my face off.

Cool things...

In a few years when I hit it big and I got mad cheddar to throw around, I want to get some balla stuff to put around my house. These are things that most people won't think of when they hit it big. Most people think of getting a house and a nice car. I'm gonna get those things also, but I want some other cool shit also.
-I want a sick fish tank in my bedroom. One that is built into the wall. I want to be able to look thru this fish tank into another room. Also, I want a shark to go into this tank. and a blowfish.
-I want a trophy wife. Not just a regular wife. One that I show off to my friends because she is hott and i nail her all the time. So if you are good looking and interested on being eye candy for me and my friends for the rest of your life, let me know.
-I want a batting cage in my house. Kinda like Carmelo Anthony's (for those of us that watch cribs).
-I want a life size statue of me. That way I can see if clothes will look good on me by putting them on my statue first. That way I never wear anything that makes me look like a douchbag.
-I want a hott maid. I also want a butler. The butler can do the work and the hott maid could just be hott.
-I want a waterfall shower. Those ones that are straight overhead and the water pretty much falls on you. Those are awesome. Also, my trophy wife would appreciate it. I would also like a sauna because they are dope.
-I want a guest house on my property, but like a mile away, that I can throw unwanted guests in. I will say "You can stay in our guest house" and hope that it don't see them for the rest of their visit.
-I want one of those sick golf machines. The ones that you can hit the ball into the screen and your shot is portrayed on a virtual course. Like the one they play with on Entourage.
-I want a cool pet. I love dogs, but I want something that nobody has. Maybe like a sloth. Nobody has a sloth. They seem like my type of pet too because they just want to hangout and be awesome. Speed is not a necessity.
-I want a disco ball. That way I can throw a party at anytime.
-I want an office in my house which i will refer to as my "study". I really won't do work in there. But it looks like you got your shit together if you have an office.

These are just some things that I will be getting. Let me know if there are some cool things that I would want but didn't think about.

Butthole and Asshead

Last night I was cuddling on the couch with Kelly and drinking vodka (that's right, Be jealous). In my drunken ranting I started to wonder about some stupid stuff. I started asking everyone why the words "Ass" and "Butt" are not interchangeable. Everyone calls other people assholes and some people who are awesome, like me, still use words like butthead. Well I just think that it is wierd that nobody says "you are a butthole" or "you are an asshead". These words are supposed to mean the same thing, but it is just wierd to switch them. When someone says "butthole", I actually think they are talking about the body part. I totally wouldn't think the same thing that I would if they said "asshole". So from now on I will be switching words with the same meaning. So if I call you an asshead don't think it is wierd. Also, I might use words like penishead instead of dickhead. Or maybe I will call you a vagina instead of a pussy.
Also, I will no longer be using the word retard. Instead, I will call you a fliptard. Anton's brother threw that word out earlier and I think it is mad funny. So remember that when someone does something stupid, tell them that they are fliptarded.



***********SGANGA DAY '07************
When I come home from school in about 5 weeks, my parents will be going to Florida. If I don't end up staying in Cortland for graduation weekend, there will be a party that will be at least 3 days long. So keep your calenders open from May17-20. I will be partying that whole time most likely and anyone who reads this blog is more than welcome to join me. I will have more details later to let everyone know if it is a definite. Also, if you come there and act like an asshead, I will fuck you up, vagina!